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Torah · 20:39

Daily Boost Ep.97: The Unhappiness Trap

217 views · Aug 4, 2020

Charlie Harary

Discusses how outcome-based happiness can lead to unhappiness and hinder success.

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The opening of this shiur, in Charlie Harary’s own words — taken from the captions, so names and Hebrew terms may be approximate.

hey good morning everybody hope everybody's doing well welcome to the day excited to be back with you again i hope and pray that you guys are getting from this i know i am just the opportunity to be together is huge for me so thank you so much for tuning in we've been talking a lot about happiness and the reason why we're doing this slowly and not quickly is because life is like a cup of coffee it is meant to be sipped not gulped and when you do when you get into topics that have the risk of being gulped there's a risk of us just digesting it quickly and not really getting into ourselves happiness is one of those it makes sense it's very difficult so we gotta like really spend the time and understand it from all the different angles so that by the time we're done together which will never be fully done at least time we spend together it will become almost intuitive to us i hope yesterday we discussed this idea that materialism and the pursuit of a materialistic accomplishment is could be a big trap for our happiness now the pursuit of meaningful goals is exactly one of the ways you become happy and we'll get there but what ends up happening is we begin our lives with this sense of this innate happiness and for many of us it gets replaced with a striving for something objective right you're going for something you're going for a grade or you're going for a victory or you're going for an acceptance letter or you're going for social acceptance or if there's something in our world that we want and we either are convinced without not saying this takes place deliberately

Jump to a moment

  1. 0:00hey good morning everybody hope everybody's doing well welcome to the day excited to be back…
  2. 2:05we're convinced by others or we convince ourselves that if i really want to be happy…
  3. 4:08striving towards something bigger and so what happens is we condition ourselves to be less than…
  4. 6:12world works and we don't even know like there's another way we think like either you're…
  5. 8:16the self-determination theory remember one of those is significance so this applies a lot when you're…
  6. 10:21will be good most people doing the lotteries their lives mess up afterwards because they're not…
  7. 12:53of out by rigorous research in psychology and neuroscience management studies and bottom lines of organizations…
  8. 14:55groups they did the study on children and with blocks to figure out which kids would…
  9. 16:58it's like you're really smiling and what they call the pan-american smile pan america was i…
  10. 19:00and is always real but thanks for that it's pretty cool that we have someone on…

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