Rebbetzin Chana Bilek--In-Laws, Friends and Colleagues: Effectively Managing Close Relationships

What’s said in this shiur

The opening of this shiur, in America's Top Rebbetzins’s own words — taken from the captions, so names and Hebrew terms may be approximate.

so she was adopted and she was born into poverty in South Korea but she's now married to an orthodox Rabbi living in Baltimore Maryland wow what a journey thank you so much for being here please tell us more about yourself and your story thank you Vera um first of all please just call me Khana um the reference titles you know a smaller title I definitely have many um identities of as an adoptee I've gone through different um Journeys in terms of just my name actually I was planning not to marinate a rabbi and um God granted me that wish but then I ended up making him a rabbi so in our first few years of marriage she became a rabbi and then by default I became a rabbit son wow that's one part but basically right as an adoptee um yes I indeed um I no I actually in the beginning I didn't know really what the situation in terms of like how poverty stricken I was I just had on my information in My adoptive adoptive adoption file that probably was a poverty situation as I was very sick when they found me and that was what was in the information so as an adoptee to a white American family of from South Korea as the age of two in my young childhood years in my teenage years I really had a really question what makes a relationship a relationship right it wasn't a given from a very right on from the beginning so I think that has really given me an edge in terms of understanding um what a relationship is and how to form those relationships and make sure they are what is going to be helpful for my identity so I really question my

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1. 0:33so she was adopted and she was born into poverty in South Korea but she's now…
2. 4:50even think how important relationships were in your life because we're going to be talking about…
3. 9:41know you're right the Hallmark everybody's happy everybody's joyful no nobody's complaining about dinner like everybody…
4. 13:58people are feeling right this is where the even mother-in-law who seems very judgmental or we…
5. 18:41yet you're not connecting what is the connections that happen you're not sharing your feelings you're…
6. 22:51that's part of the process and that we have to decide what was the situation again…
7. 27:33gets bigger and bigger right right and then we can't handle it we can't hold it…
8. 31:42you to do but you you know after you take pause and you think okay well…
9. 36:27years and so she was working in the government so her work is government oriented and…
10. 40:37older gentlemen both from different um cultures right so um you know one was one was…

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