Purim! Starting a New Life | Rabbi Fischel Schachter

What’s said in this shiur

The opening of this shiur, in Vayimaen’s own words — taken from the captions, so names and Hebrew terms may be approximate.

Hi, is this Purim Praise Instant Mishloach Manos? <font color=#F0FF00FF>No, this is Google.</font> <font color=#F0FF00FF>We're doing it automatically this year.</font> Oh, okay. I’d like to order Mishloach Manos, same as last year. <font color=#F0FF00FF>As last year or what you had</font> <font color=#F0FF00FF>for Melaveh Malka last night?</font> Wha-wha-what? <font color=#F0FF00FF>For Melaveh Malka last night</font> <font color=#F0FF00FF>you had 3 pizzas,</font> <font color=#F0FF00FF>6 falafels, 4 French fries.</font> That was not for me, that was for the whole family. <font color=#F0FF00FF>Really? So why at 3 a.m.</font> <font color=#F0FF00FF>did you order Pepto-Bismol,</font> <font color=#F0FF00FF>Alka-Seltzer and</font> <font color=#F0FF00FF>you called your doctor?</font> Listen, it's none of your concern, okay? Can you pl... I’m just ordering Mishloach Manos. Rum Balls, please. <font color=#F0FF00FF>Fat-free, cholesterol-free.</font> Why? <font color=#F0FF00FF>Because your cholesterol is very high.</font> It is not very high. <font color=#F0FF00FF>That's what you wrote</font> <font color=#F0FF00FF>in your life insurance policy,</font> <font color=#F0FF00FF>but the reality is it is.</font> <font color=#F0FF00FF>I have the numbers</font> <font color=#F0FF00FF>right in front of me.</font> That’s it. That’s it. I'm getting out of here. I’m leaving. This is a crazy world. I'm going out of here. I'm flying off someplace. <font color=#F0FF00FF>Why would you fly away now?</font> <font color=#F0FF00FF>There's still two weeks</font> <font color=#F0FF00FF>left on your Mikvah card,</font> <font color=#F0FF00FF>and second of all, your</font> <font color=#F0FF00FF>mileage points aren't up to base,</font> <font color=#F0FF00FF>and besides, for that -</font> Besides that what? <font color=#F0FF00FF>You're 70 pounds overweight.</font> <font color=#F0FF00FF>Make sure they only</font> <font color=#F0FF00FF>weigh your suitcase, not you.</font> Goodbye! So Goo

Jump to a moment

1. 0:05Hi, is this Purim Praise Instant Mishloach Manos? <font color=#F0FF00FF>No, this is Google.</font> <font color=#F0FF00FF>We're doing…
2. 0:35<font color=#F0FF00FF>Because your cholesterol is very high.</font> It is not very high. <font color=#F0FF00FF>That's what you…
3. 1:05or a minute afterwards. That only the Ribono shel Olam knows. Somebody once came to the…
4. 1:36But... -Leave the hat here. But I need my hat. -You don't need your hat. Your…
5. 2:06It's our chance to reset. It doesn't make a difference how many times you blew it.…

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