How to Stop Getting Hurt by Criticism? The Secret That Will Change Your Life

What’s said in this shiur

The opening of this shiur, in Rabbi Zamir Cohen’s own words — taken from the captions, so names and Hebrew terms may be approximate.

Today we will deal with a subject that no person in the world can escape. The challenge of receiving criticism. How should one relate to criticism? There is no one who does not hear remarks or critiques. And there are situations where as a result a person withdraws inwardly, falls into sadness, feels insulted or hurt. This can lead to a loss of motivation. A person loses strength, has no desire to do anything. And the more respected, important, or significant the person giving the rebuke is in one's eyes, the deeper and more painful the hurt becomes. In Pirkei Avot, chapter 6, Mishnah 6, our sages list 48 qualities through which the Torah is acquired. A person who wants the Torah to truly become his possession, for the Torah to be part of him, and he a part of the Torah, his entire essence shaped by it, must fulfill 48 conditions mentioned there. Among them are qualities such as loving people, fleeing from honor, diligence in study, repetition and review. But one of the qualities listed there is something that seems surprising. Loving rebuke. What does it mean to love rebuke? How can someone love being criticized? Ask any person, "Do you want criticism and comments?" Deep down, most people want to hear only praise. How good they are, how pleasant, how successful, how perfect. So who would want to love rebuke? King Solomon addresses this as well. In the Book of Proverbs he says, "Poverty and disgrace come to one who ignores discipline, but one who keeps rebuke will be honored." Solomon, the wisest of all men, uses very precise language. The word rash, poor, does not merely mean someone who was

Jump to a moment

1. 0:00Today we will deal with a subject that no person in the world can escape. The…
2. 5:04convinced that he is always right. Typically, this kind of person also dominates others and causes…
3. 10:12commentary for those who find the original Hebrew challenging since the Ramchal lived about 200 years…
4. 15:16systems. I continue living with joy. This is not always easy, especially when the criticism comes…
5. 20:24but the other responds with calmness and composure, there is no one to fight with. The…
6. 26:00Do not be sad that you sold me. Something good came from this. For there have…
7. 31:09we notice something extraordinary. Joseph was in prison completely innocent. Potiphar's wife falsely accused him and…
8. 36:16this supposed to be?" But a wise husband applies the verse, "Love covers all transgressions." Even…
9. 41:28a desire fulfilled is sweet to the soul. When a person has an urge to say…
10. 46:36bit further to the 31st floor, but looked at the clock and realized there was no…

Every second of this shiur plays inside Lehallel — a filtered YouTube library of Torah, music and shiurim. No ads, no comments, no autoplay.