The Home Front: Make Your Spouse a Priority - Rabbi Yirmiyahu Abramov

What’s said in this shiur

The opening of this shiur, in Rabbi Dovid Orlofsky’s own words — taken from the captions, so names and Hebrew terms may be approximate.

[Music] welcome to the home front you know when a man and woman get married two lives combin two people combin two personalities combin but also two lives friends families today I'd like to speak a little bit about what to do when that creates a certain kind of friction what to do when one spouse for whatever reason Justified or unjustified disapproves of the company the others keeping Rabbi how do we approach differing social lives within a marriage I think that initially probably the best formula would be a complete Hiatus from the rest of the world let the young couple go to a desert island and spend a year or two completely alone and this way all their other prior um relationships just kind of dissipate in into the past um and with a focus fully and totally on the on themselves so let's imagine the highly improbable situation where that's not possible I see and uh let's try and think of some way that we can approximate that okay so um I agree with you it's probably um not a very Pro practical solution but the idea is important that that's what we should aim for that's the concept the idea is that you know the in the Torah there is a special Mitzvah it's a very a special commandment something which is completely unique and that is called shanar sh the first year of marriage has its own princip principles its own laws um and the time spent in this first year people should be

Jump to a moment

1. 0:00[Music] welcome to the home front you know when a man and woman get married two…
2. 2:44bonding together um and of course we're delighted to have guests we're delighted to you know…
3. 5:57the place of study and that's that's to be respected but it's important that a statement…
4. 9:17person's got to in every element of his conduct and his behavior make demonstrations um to…
5. 12:02couple by the Creator himself God himself every couple that gets married he gives a gift…
6. 15:24shaking the very foundations of this and it's interesting thing you know that um this concept…
7. 18:33you said a basketball game or something is is more acceptable but let's say he gets…
8. 21:22it's a dangerous thing and the wife most definitely legitimately now from the wife wife's perspective…
9. 24:42of relaxed gossip this is not a healthy thing it's not a healthy thing um it…
10. 27:53lot of self-discipline absolutely that's the name of the game in life is self-control and self…

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