Parenting in Modern Times - Rabbi David Orlofsky

What’s said in this shiur

The opening of this shiur, in Rabbi Dovid Orlofsky’s own words — taken from the captions, so names and Hebrew terms may be approximate.

I I share with you what my mother said to me about 10 years ago. I don't have to bring up kids today. It's a different world. It's a different world. Everything has changed. All of the assumptions that we worked with, you know, those of us who are parents, you could you don't have to tell me. You can tell yourself. Did you ever tell a kid something and he told you no? I never said that to my father, not twice. Everybody knows, you know, your parents tell you something and you know, if they're not looking, you can mutter under your breath. You know what I mean? You can mumble, you can grumble, but you did what your parents told you. That's how it worked. That was the assumption, you know? There's a terrible book called A Child Called It. It was on the New York Times best seller list, a series of three books about this guy who was one of the worst child abuse cases in the world. And he was born after me. He was born '60s, '60s, '70s, I don't remember. And he outlines the terrible abuse that he went through and what he put up with. And at one point, he later in the story, his teenage son says, "Dad, why didn't you tell her no?" And he said, "Because when I was a kid, no one ever did that." You never told your parents no. Those are the things. Now, now this every kind of expert tells you, you know, we have to deal differently with our children. The assumptions are gone.

Jump to a moment

1. 0:29I I share with you what my mother said to me about 10 years ago. I…
2. 6:51room full of Yeshiva kids who would all rather be Christian, yeah? That's a scary story.…
3. 13:07to offer. Come on. When the Yamim Noraim come around, that joyous time, you know? You…
4. 19:24Gehenna. That you do understand. Yeah? All the heat in this world is 1/60 of the…
5. 25:45your heart. You have to believe it. You have to feel it. It's not enough to…
6. 32:02I said, 'Now I understand. You don't believe in the Aibershter.' And nobody wants to hear…
7. 38:24Yeah? Not just that he tolerates us and he waits for us. Yeah? And the more…
8. 44:44I'd ask them a question. This the says that you know cuz I was a there…
9. 51:08And then when he would come, you know, he'd stay for a certain amount of time…
10. 57:23God, that's everything. We have to believe that ourselves. We have to teach it to our…

Every second of this shiur plays inside Lehallel — a filtered YouTube library where each video was reviewed against one written standard before it could appear. No ads, no comments, no autoplay into anything unapproved.